china essay
This is an excellent piece but the only thing I want you to add is an introduction and signpost. Below you will see the introduction criteria, please add this to help bring a sense of direction to the writing. The signposts will then be used in the body to help guide the essay.
Introduction
- You should draft an introduction when you start to give yourself a sense of direction. Start writing with a plan and a couple of sentences to guide you.
- Should contain a clear, explicit structure and argument – Explain how you intend to tackle the question/discussion, including giving a clear outline of the structure of the rest of the essay (‘This essay first defines X before evaluating A, B, and C…’).
- Explain problems involved in the question/discussion
- Clarify key terms, if this can be done briefly. If defining the terms is a core part of the argument, the definitions should be placed in the body of the essay.
- Avoid generalities – do not start with or conclude with (or otherwise include) sweeping generalities such as: ‘Plato’s theory of justice is the most important recent contribution to the perennial search for the ideal human society.’ Such remarks add nothing of substance; indeed, they subtract by distracting from the issues at hand. Moreover, they suggest that the writer is unsure what to say, and is looking for a way to fill some space. You do not want to create that suspicion. Just get right to the point.
- You should then revisit your introduction after you’ve written the essay. Confirm that what you said in the body of the essay is reflected in the introduction. If your argument shifted, update your introduction to reflect your actual structure and argument, and make sure that your argument answers the question.
****************************** Example of introduction: ******************************
The view that Taiwan is a consolidated liberal democracy is central to academic debate through scholars like Zhu, Diamond and Sin (2001, p. 122) opposing McAllister (2016, p. 44). This argument exists as there have been demonstrations of both a representative democracy and participatory democracy practice, in Taiwan. However, the difficulty lies in determining whether Taiwan is or is not a consolidated liberal democracy because the two democratic practices have tensions. This essay will contest that to some extent, Taiwan is a consolidated liberal democracy [through the influence of their citizens on legislation]. To begin the essay will first describe the practices of a representative and participatory democracy. It will then compare the two democratic practices to guide the argument – this analysis will look at the democratic practices at face value [before evaluating it in the instance of Taiwan]. The essay will then evaluate the Taiwan government and party system and how it holds limits to an effective democracy – which will help analyse the argument of Taiwan not being a consolidated liberal democracy. This segment will be sequenced by an evaluation of The Wild Strawberry Movement of 2008 and Sunflower Movement of 2014 to address how its causes and consequences are made from Taiwan’s limits of an effective democracy. After, a short summary will be made to outline the key arguments and inferences made in the body of the essay. The essay will end with a conclusion to the thesis, this will also feature an analysis of the potential problems Taiwan could face – that could harm their consolidated liberal democracy.
Body
- Follow the order indicated in your introduction.
- Use signposts (‘Having demonstrated A, this essay will now explore B…’) to indicate to the reader that you are moving on to a new point.
- The first sentence of each paragraph/section/point should indicate the content of that paragraph. This should help you stay focused on the essay topic.
