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Negative Parental Responses to Coming Out and Family Functioning in a Sample of Lesbian and Gay Young Adults

Roberto Baiocco • Lilybeth Fontanesi • Federica Santamaria • Salvatore Ioverno •

Barbara Marasco • Emma Baumgartner • Brian L. B. Willoughby •

Fiorenzo Laghi

Published online: 27 March 2014

� Springer Science+Business Media New York 2014

Abstract Parental responses to youths’ coming out (CO)

are crucial to the subsequent adjustment of children and

family. The present study investigated the negative

parental reaction to the disclosure of same-sex attraction

and the differences between maternal and paternal

responses, as reported by their homosexual daughters and

sons. Participants’ perceptions of their parents’ reactions

(evaluated through the Perceived Parental Reactions Scale,

PPRS), age at CO, gender, parental political orientation,

and religiosity involvement, the family functioning

(assessed through the Family Adaptability and Cohesion

Evaluation Scales), were assessed in 164 Italian gay and

lesbian young adults. Pearson correlation coefficients were

calculated to assess the relation between family functioning

and parental reaction to CO. The paired sample t test was

used to compare mothers and fathers’ scores on the PPRS.

Hierarchical multiple regression was conducted to analyze

the relevance of each variable. No differences were found

between mothers and fathers in their reaction to the dis-

closure. The analysis showed that a negative reaction to

CO was predicted by parents’ right-wing political conser-

vatism, strong religious beliefs, and higher scores in the

scales Rigid and Enmeshed. Findings confirm that a neg-

ative parental reaction is the result of poor family resources

to face a stressful situation and a strong belief in traditional

values. These results have important implications in both

clinical and social fields.

Keywords Coming out � Disclosure � Lesbian and gay young adults � Parental reactions � Family functioning

Introduction

The coming-out (CO) process, defined as the sharing of

one’s sexual orientation with others, has been described as

an essential component in lesbian and gay (LG) identity

formation and integration (Cass 1979; Legate et al. 2012).

Identity integration includes acceptance of one’s gay, les-

bian, or bisexual identity, and sharing this aspect of the self

with other individuals. Previous researches have indicated

that CO process may have positive effects on relationships

with others (e.g., improving authenticity of a friendship),

the construction of self-identity, and mental health (e.g.,

decreased hypervigilance/anxiety) (Baiocco et al. 2012;

Shilo and Savaya 2011; Vaughan and Waehler 2010).

Erikson’s model of sexual identity development (1959,

1982) posits that certain stages and ‘‘tasks’’ must be nav-

igated successfully to form a healthy personality. These

eight steps go through the implementation of tasks con-

cerning trust, differentiation, autonomy and the manage-

ment of doubts, fear and conflict, inside the family and the

society (Erikson 1982). According to this point of view,

CO can be assimilated into a developmental task. For LG

adolescents, this process may be growth-enhancing event

and is highly important to developing an integrated identity

and for strengthening self-esteem (Henry 2013). Such

R. Baiocco (&) � L. Fontanesi � S. Ioverno � B. Marasco � E. Baumgartner � F. Laghi Department of Developmental and Social Psychology, Faculty of

Medicine and Psychology, Sapienza University of Rome, Rome,

Italy

e-mail: roberto.baiocco@uniroma1.it

F. Santamaria

Department of Psychology, Faculty of Education, University of

Messina, Messina, Italy

B. L. B. Willoughby

Department of Psychology, University of Miami, Coral Gables,

FL, USA

123

J Child Fam Stud (2015) 24:1490–1500

DOI 10.1007/s10826-014-9954-z

experiences of growth may provide sexual minorities with

important strengths that can be used to effectively manage

stress related to their minority status (Lingiardi et al. 2012;

Meyer 1995, 2003). However, despite the potential benefits

of CO, there are also associated stressors, which can have a

deleterious impact on physical and psychological health

(Frost et al. 2013). These stressors can include family

rejection, bullying, discrimination and prejudices (Frost

et al. 2013; Guzzo et al. 2014). The CO process may also

place significant strain on family relationships, cause inter-

parental conflict, and exacerbate parent mental health

issues (e.g., Willoughby et al. 2008). Given this, a strong

and cohesive family, displaying adequate resources to

manage stressful situations, may provide a supportive

environment for the LG adolescent who decides to come

out. The majority of LG young people often do not have

access to positive models (i.e., parents often do not share

the same sexual orientation) and their families may reject

their sexual orientation (Bos et al. 2004). In the American

context, research indicate that as many as 52 % of parents

may initially react negatively to their child’s disclosure of

same sex attractions (D’augelli et al. 2008). The negative

consequences of rejecting reactions from parents range

from depression (Legate et al. 2012), negative LG identity

(Willoughby et al. 2010), and substance abuse (Baiocco

et al. 2010) to, in some extreme cases, suicide (Ryan et al.

2009). On the other hand, a supportive and positive family

environment is associated with positive young adult health

outcomes, such as low level of internalized sexual stigma,

depression and suicidal idealization, and high level of

social support and self-esteem (Baiocco et al. 2012;

D’Augelli and Grossman 2001; Hoffman et al. 2009; Lo

Cascio et al. 2013; Pace et al. 2012; Resnick et al. 1997;

Russell 2003; Ryan et al. 2010).

Italy, where the present study was conducted, is a

family-oriented society in which adolescents and young

adults are more extensively involved with their extended

families than members of other Western societies (Baiocco

et al. 2013; Pallini and Laghi 2012). LG men in Italy fre-

quently confront a roster of biases and prejudices and a

greater level of gender segregation in their daily lives

(Lingiardi et al. 2012). Previous studies in Italy, in fact,

have found high levels of internalized sexual stigma in gay

and lesbian adolescents and young adults (Baiocco et al.

2010, 2012; Lingiardi et al. 2012). Thus, a supportive

family environment becomes extremely significant, since

Italian culture is characterized by a great level of gender

segregation. Widespread heterosexism in society estab-

lishes that the only normatively acceptable sexual behav-

iors are heterosexual (Herek and Garnets 2007). In Italy,

LG adolescents and young adults encounter many diffi-

culties and may be afraid of disclosing their sexual orien-

tation because of unfavorable outcomes such as social

rejection and discrimination, which are realistic

possibilities.

Parental rejection at the time of disclosure is a strong,

negative event that can affect all aspects of an adolescent’s

life, and it is crucial to understand how this reaction is

elicited and how to support parent, child, and family

adjustment following the disclosure. This process is well

described by the Family Stress Theory (Patterson 2002),

developed with the purpose of explaining how and why

stressful events negatively affect the wellbeing of the

family and, as already underlined, the disclosure could be

one of these events.

According to this theory, within which the present

research is developed, parental reactions to CO is the result

of three main elements: a family’s relational capabilities

and competences, family members’ beliefs about meanings

of stressful events, and the amount of stressors that

undermine family stability (Willoughby et al. 2008).

Family-based resources, such as cohesion, adaptability, and

flexibility, may represent valuable predictors to understand

how the family will react to their child’s CO (Carnelley

et al. 2011). The literature underlines how families, with

adequate relational capacities, coping abilities, and a higher

level of resilience, often face difficult events in supportive

ways, such as displaying a more positive reaction to their

sons and daughters’ sexual orientation disclosures (Lavee

and Olson 1991; Willoughby et al. 2006).

As mentioned above, CO to family, especially to par-

ents, is often the biggest challenge for same-sex attracted

young people (Savin-Williams 2005; Savin-Williams and

Ream 2003; Savin-Williams and Dube 1998). However,

despite the risk of disapproval and victimization, the

majority of gay and lesbian adolescents decide to come out

to their parents (LaSala 2000). A handful of studies (Ben-

Ari 1995; D’Augelli et al. 2002; LaSala 2000; Saltzburg

2004; Savin-Williams 2001; Willoughby et al. 2006) have

examined parents’ initial reactions to their youth’s CO.

Literature underlines the relevance of the following vari-

ables for predicting parents’ negative reactions to CO:

parental age (i.e., older parents react more negatively;

Baiocco et al. 2013; Savin-Williams 2001), lower levels of

parental education (Conley 2011), involvement in tradi-

tional religious associations (Baiocco et al. 2013b; Schope

2002), traditional values about family and marriage

(Newman and Muzzonigro 1993), and more traditional

attitudes regarding sex roles (Cramer and Roach 1988).

Concerning those factors, parental reaction is affected by

the meaning each member of the family gives to the dis-

closure. This process involves not only religious beliefs,

political ideology, but also cultural and educational back-

grounds. If one or both parents hold preexisting negative

beliefs and values about homosexuality, then they may be

repulsed by the disclosure (Cramer and Roach 1988). More

J Child Fam Stud (2015) 24:1490–1500 1491

123

specifically, these beliefs affect their personal beliefs about

the causes of homosexuality: believing that homosexuality

is learned rather than, for example, genetic; holding gay

and…

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