Revising the paper
Writing
Follow the suggestion from professor modify the paper. THE MODIFIED PART IS MARKED WITH RED COLOR
Professor suggestion:
Some more improvements. You identify the new market that does not have credit cards but are you fully exploring this as a market. Please do not just make the changes that I recommend, you need to research the idea and present a clear plan of how to reach them and why they should be reached.
The convenience factor is probably less important to many customers. They are already travelling to the Sprinkles ATM, so is there information that says the ATMs are active when the store is closed?
Making small improvements is good, but it does not look like the changes are being researched or explored fully.
You should ask yourself if the Cupcake ATM is a business model or a marketing opportunity. Based on the pictures, some of the ATMs are actually in the stores. This would seem to be a “fun” experience for the customer as opposed to a marketing channel expansion.You also argue that the installation of the ATMs is “low cost”. I’ve worked in vending and my experience is that these types of machines are very expensive. Maintenance costs are often very high. They are also custom made for Sprinkles and while prices will come down the more they make, unless you move to mass retailing it will not drop significantly.The payment issue could be an idea on its own. While young professionals, their target demographic, mostly have credit cards, the younger demographic is a large market segment with disposable income, but not necessarily credit cards.
